I have ( it seems) always had a tendency towards procrastination when I'm starting something new. Part of that is a desire to have a "grand plan" and "do it right" -- part of it is the tendency towards day-dreaming about what might be rather than getting on with living in the present -- whatever the reason finding a balance between planning and doing has always been a "challenge" for me.
I have written about this before (long before the surgery). in a post called "Living by the Nike creed?".
Last January before I knew that I had a very serious problem with my heart, I had re-stated several principles for living that I wanted to keep my eye on. These principles are summarized in this "theme for living" which remains "front & center" in my thinking.
I will live today in the moment. I will live today as if it were my last day here on this earth and I will dream and plan today for tomorrow because “Today is the first day of the rest of my life; I will rejoice and be glad in it” (cf. Psalm 118:24-KJV).
During the recovery period from my surgery my thinking was mostly on "how do I make the most of each moment?" and "What would I be doing if this were the last day of my life?" -- however, in the past few months I've been wanting to shift more into "first day .." thinking.
So that's what I "want" to do -- and you'd think that bumping up against your mortality would make it easier to live this way. But as time goes by I find myself drifting back into old habits ... and in particular letting unimportant, things fill my time while procrastinating on the important or at least what I consider to be important.
So, in an effort to get past that I'm committing a relatively short time - half hour at least - to writing in this blog. To see how it evolves and whether it is helpful to me -- and maybe to others in being more satisfied that I am "making good use of the time" God has given me here (cf. Ephesians 5:15-16, Col. 4:5).
My point in this post is that I have found myself drifting very much into procrastination and "time wasting" activities such as playing games and over attention to things like FACEBOOK.
I hope re-focussing on "just do it" will help -- although what I "do" must have meaning and purpose -- I found myself thinking of Abraham's servant in Genesis 24 when he was sent to look for a wife for Isaac --
He had completed a long and tiring journey -- he might have been forgiven if he'd said "I'll rest tonight and do my business tomorrow" but in Genesis 24:33 we find "
Then food was set before him to eat. But he said, “I will not eat until I have said what I have to say.”
If something is important (to me) and has a purpose for me, I pray for this attitude to "just do it".